"Michael S." <m.sabino at comcast.net> wrote in message news:<NKbBb.469203$HS4.3663427 at attbi_s01>...
> Hello,
>> When I was 5 years old, I was diagnosed with ADD (without hyperactivity).
> This is ususual since I'm a male, and most of those who exhibit symptoms of
> ADD without hyperactivity are female.
> There are a few reasons why I think this may be the case. But I think there
> is an early-childhood origin in rearing that led to these symptoms in me.
> Mostly, I was educated from my parents in areas that differed from the
> material tought in school. As an example... when I was 5 in preschool, my
> dad would teach me about electric circuitry at home, while at school the
> teachers would watch in amazement as I'd drift offtopic while they were
> teaching something as commonplace knowledge in that agegroup as the letters
> of the alphabet.
> I also notice that this parallel exists when females are tought less
> education-orientated topics than males from their family, so I wonder if
> that's the reason why females more often develop the add without
> hyperactivity than males. Does encouraging distraction by barbie dolls allow
> the brain to be deficient in long-term thought processes (such as those that
> occur in the prefrontal cortex)?
> Anyway, I digress. There were many family troubles that gave me problems
> with what I perceived as depression at an age as young as 10. I would easily
> be distracted from the task at hand, or become anxious due to the negative
> thought patterns that enveloped the task that I should've been completing.
> My mom suffered from depression, and I'm concerned that I may be developing
> this same condition.
> There's even a more significant parallel between my mom and I than that of
> general depression. I've become really concerned with what others are
> saying, and have been completing conversations in my head without being
> completely sure of what's going on. These conversations that I believe I'm
> overhearing are almost always about bad things about me. This may stem from
> my fear of actually becoming involved in the conversation, since I'm afraid
> to be around people (somewhat because of acne).
> I get so nervous at school sometimes that the whole world seems to tune out.
> Sometimes I've considered suicide, and sometimes I've feared that will be
> how I'll meet fate.
> Right now I'm 16 and having difficulty focusing on schoolwork because of
> this anxiety, and my dad keeps stalling about seeing a counselor or a doctor
> since he doesn't like their advice. The counsoulers apparently give me
> advice that's too much towards my own aims, and not much towards his, while
> the doctors always prescribe medication. I don't believe this to be true,
> but if he does, there's nothing that I can do.
> My last counsoler was "too intellectual". Perhaps my dad would be more
> satisfied by the cajun women downtown who can give me some all-natural fruit
> juice to remedy my problems. Then again, that would be too easy, wouldn't
> it?
> I get very distracted by things outside of school, and it's constantly been
> driving me away from schoolwork... I'd much rather read about general
> relativity than about how to draw stupid conceptual models in junior
> chemistry.
> These problems don't exist during the summer regardless of whether I'm
> waking up at 6am for summer school or not (though summer school lasts 4
> hours, compared with the usual 7hrs of school). Does melatonin have
> something to do with this? (I think I read somewhere that melatonin
> concentrations are higher during the summer due to a reaction involving
> sunlight)
> Would pure melatonin pass the blood brain barrier? do you know of any sites
> that provide a list of chemicals that cross the blood brain barrier and are
> synthesized into a particular neurotransmitter?
>> After searching on google I can across: "Some people become more depressed
> in the winter months when days are shorter and darker. The sun and bright
> light seem to trigger a response to a brain hormone known as melatonin
> (produced by the pineal gland), which is, in part, responsible for
> preventing the "blues." Stay in brightly-lit rooms on dark days. Research
> reveals that two hours of morning sun is very effective in lifting
> depression. The evening light had comparatively little results."
> What drugs can I take to make me feel this way during the winter?
>>> Thanks.
>> Michael S.
>> I stayed home today to complete my homework and I didn't really get any done
> :(
If anything I say appears cruel I do not intend it, though I'm sure I
may get flamed for it. Reading your post I was struck by the general
style as opposed to any specific content - you are very introverted to
the point of being self-obsessed. It seems to me you are far too
quick to draw inferences about current 'problems' being caused by what
has happened in your life. Underlying it all there seems to be a
rather obsequious and sinister desire to be regarded as special and
"different but better" e.g. ..teachers watched in amazement... ...
I'd much rather read special relativity... Now I don't deny that this
is largely a cultural influence on you, the affliction of a thousand
movies with a lonely kid turning out to be a troubled genius, and also
the contemporary notion that we must all have something special about
us, and the easiest to be is sick in some 'cool' way (i.e. its not
cool to have gangrene, but it is to have 'mental' problems). I would
suggest reflecting on what you wrote and what you would think of
someone else who wrote the same. If you are not careful you could
turn in to someone like Ken Collins (search this newsgroup)!