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Children and Careers

Deb dclauswa.gas.uug.arizona.edu
Thu Jul 21 17:24:00 EST 1994

In article <94196.113619CEC100G at ODUVM.BITNET>
<CEC100G at ODUVM.BITNET> writes:

> I am 32 years old and just finishing my Ph.D.  I am married and we both would
> like kids and I feel that the clock is beginning to tick faster and faster.
> I am getting quite concerned over this issue because I want to have children
> soon, especially when I consider how old I'll be when they reach their college
> years but I also recognize that as a new Ph.D. I should be getting out there
> and grabbing all the experience that I can.  Even if I land a job ASAP that
> is permanent, how long should one wait to have children?  I ask this from an
> ethical context in relation to responsibilities as an employee and also in
> terms of what my legal rights are.  I wonder what sort of considerations
> one must make in an academic environment?  I feel torn and also a bit resentful
> that I could conceivably find myself 5 years down the road, still not ever
> having children while I pursue career options.
> I would like to hear from other women.  Having children is a choice and
> along with these choices we make are certain repercussions, for good or
> bad.  What choices have you made?  What insights do you have?  Have you ever
> been descriminated against due to the possibility that you might
> "reproduce" and "be out of commission"?
> Thanks: I hope to hear your comments
> Chris

Chris, if you wait for the perfect time to have kids, you may never
have them. There is no "perfect" time. I have several friends who
waited too long and are very regretful of putting their careers first.
I, likewise, wanted to wait until the perfect time. I am now very
thankful for the little "surprise" that was born in December. When I
found out I was pregnant, I thought it couldn't have happened at a
worse time (new job across the country, new home, etc). Now that she's
here, I am glad that it happened. Problems always work themselves out.
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