My sincerest condolences to you. I am not a mother, so I certainly can't
understand fully your pain, but I certainly can sympathize with you on
your loss. My sister-in-law also had a miscarriage, although for her it
was related to undetected PID, but she was able to conceive about 3 months
after her D&C and subsequent treatment. I wish you all the best of luck if
and when you try again.
Take "mental health days". No one has to know your feeling emotionally
"ill" (when in fact you're completely normal) rather than a severe
headache, back pain, whatever. You mentioned the fetal-loss group you
attended was helpful, so go again and bring your husband or mom or good
friend. Knowing that other people share the same pain is actually helpful
in the recovery process - it means you're not alone. Take care of yourself
because no one else can do it as well as you can.
VDT's, standing and anything else related to miscarriages or pregnancy
complications is all Greek to me, but it doesn't surprise me to hear that
there is so much conflicting information. Actually, when you consider that
there is only a 15% chance of a sperm ever reaching the egg, it's amazing
that any women ever get pregnant (animals are much better at this
reproduction thing than humans). It sounds to me like you need a trip to
the library and head for the medical books. Or maybe some of the reputable
motherhood/child-rearing magazines or journals would also be helpful. Read
lots, and educate yourself, but don't get crazy and paranoid about
conceiving - relaxation is the name of the game.
Best wishes to you Maureen! I hope 1994 is a very happy year for you!
Karen J. Kroslowitz phone: 808-848-4118
Natural Sciences, Malacology fax: 808-841-8968
Bernice P. Bishop Museum kroz at bishop.bishop.hawaii.org